Shattered – by Adriana


Rating: Acceptable Minus

The Basics: Classic Era (compliant to GoF with some elements of later books), Romance,  100k

Warnings: None yet, but I didn’t finish reading it.

As with many of my low-rated fic reviews, I only read about halfway into this story before skimming to the end.
If anything in my review is inaccurate or misconceived as a result, please feel free to let me know and I will amend my review
This fic was a huge disappointment to me because it started out SO well.  Hermione is a member of an elite group of Healers with closely guarded secrets.  She is called away from her studies in Edinburgh to join the war effort; using her secret Healing knowledge, she assists Severus Snape in creating a potion to destroy Voldemort.

The writing is technically very good, the war plot is interesting, but unfortunately, the interaction between Snape and Hermione is just awful.  It was like a soap opera – so saccharine sweet and melodramatic that I found myself laughing and rolling my eyes instead of being drawn in.   When they meet, they are almost immediately intoxicated by each other.  Hermione spies Snape walking nude out of the water and thinks,  ‘Was it a male version of Botticilli’s Venus?  No, he was a more impressive version of Michelangelo’s David.’  I mean, seriously?  I actually laughed out loud.   Every scene they have together is wooden and cliche.  I enjoyed it much more when I gave them Spanish accents and pretended I was watching a dubbed Telemundo episode.  I stopped reading about 2/3 of the way through when it became clear that nothing else was going to happen in the relationship other than external obstacles, made-up fights, and inevitable reconciliation.

There is some good news here, though – one of the biggest reasons I kept reading as long as I did – Draco Malfoy is totally awesome in this fic.  He is funny, well-rounded, nice backstory, super witty, believable, and just fun to read.  I was far more interested in Draco’s storyline than Hermione’s or Snape’s.  I think this author would be STELLAR with a Marauder humor fic, or maybe an action-focused ensemble fic – she’s great at Gryffindorish wit and group humor.  Unfortunately, Hermione/Snape is a dark, intellect-based romance, and it’s just not the author’s strong point at all.

I skipped to the end of the story, and the melodrama was just as bad if not worse, so I know I made the right decision.  When the dialogue is that cliche, it’s not them, it’s just words on a page.  You know?

The bottom line: For an SSHG reading, this is a pretty lame fic that I would recommend skipping.  It’s a bad soap opera.  Read for the hilarious, well-written Draco, if that’s your dish, but in that case you’d be better off just finding a great Draco fic and reading that instead.


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